Halloween

[© 2012 Marie Edwards. Heritage Makers calendar I designed. Nothing scary, gory or Satanic going on here.]

Now, I know I might be stepping on people’s feelings about this day. I am very sorry if I do. After reading several things, and experiencing them, I feel compelled to address a few things and groups –

** Some hate it, for whatever reason

** Some are religiously opposed to it

** Some LOVE it

Me?

I’m ambivalent about it. Really. So, I’m in the middle. I’m not fond of it. I don’t love it, I don’t hate it, but I’m not religiously opposed to it either. And, just because I don’t celebrate it, doesn’t mean I will attack those who do or make them feel bad about it either.

I didn’t get to trick or treat much as a child – usually it was the neighborhood we were in or lack of a cool costume, mostly … I was sick (thank you cold & flu season). But, there were a few “fun/safe” places I got to go and got some treats. And, for a while, our household handed out candy (though I do wish my grandma would have saved some candy for me). My memories of Halloween weren’t too bad.

Now?

For the last several years, we turn off the lights, put up a sign that we have no candy, and don’t decorate (never did really). We head up to the second floor and hide out until from about 5-6 pm until 10-11 pm.

While that seems mean, it stemmed from a few things we came to realize over the years:

** Food allergies [never know when a parent might “sue” you for making their kid sick or worse, even if it was unintentional. It isn’t like we know all the kids in a 2-5 mile radius]

** Dentists who “bribe” parents/kids to bring in the candy, buy it, destroy it/throw it away [that makes me sick even writing about it, let alone thinking about it; money dumped in a landfill essentially]

** Parents who buy their kids candy and destroy it/throw it away [yes, a former friend of mine did that because she was tired of looking at it and being tempted by it; again, money dumped in a landfill]

All of that equals waste (whether or not the stuff is bad, moderation is key) and that “food waste” equals “WASTED MONEY”.

Candy isn’t cheap, even if you go to Walmart. Even a $3/bag is more than some people can shell out. And, most kids want the good stuff (Snickers, Kit-Kit, Three Musketeers, Miky Way). Judging by some people’s carts, they spend upwards to $75 on the stuff. I cannot imagine just throwing $75 away.

Food Allergies –

Food allergies are good way to stop giving candy away. After all, there are “non food items”, but some of those are toys that kids may or may not enjoy and might be discarded as trash. Again, more wasted money.

You could get “treat” books that their parents can trade to another child or use under supervision. Not a good idea either.

I once witnessed a kid get a WHOLE “Frosty” book (not just a coupon) and after walking away from the residence (after the person shut the door) … the kid ripped it up and tossed it on the ground.

So the book was only $1 and had 10 free Junior Frosty coupons in it – not much waste, right? But, that had a value of $8.90 (as the Junior Frostys where I live cost $0.89/89¢ plus tax). That’s nearly $9/$10 that kid threw away. Excuse me, ripped up and thrown away.

I would have refused the gift immediately (politely saying “no thank you”) or taken it back … not ripped it up and thrown it on the ground! Can you imagine the heartbreak of the kids after that who would not get a treat because that person ran out of them? I know as a child, I would have been happy to get one coupon. A whole treat book (10)? Thrilled.

While my mother never got physical with me (not even a pat on the butt past age 2), you can believe if she found me doing something like that, she’d have swatted my butt and that’d been the last Halloween she’d take me out or let me out for. EVER.

In addition, with so many children from say ages 4-12 trick or treating, it is hard to buy something for every age, taste, and sensitivity. It could get quite expensive after a while. That is why we stopped giving out any kind of treats over 20 years ago. It became a nightmare to try to prepare for.

Evil Dentists –

Okay, so they’re not evil. But, what they do is quite questionable.

Bribing kids with cash (or toys) to bring their candy in for destruction (or to be thrown away) is really sick. All that candy in a landfill? It is disgusting and heartbreaking as some kids cannot afford to go trick-or-treating or it isn’t safe for them to do so.

While I get what the dentists are trying to do, perhaps an “educational” seminar might be better – show them what eating that candy without moderating it, without brushing, flossing, and routine check-ups will do.

Who knows? Maybe the kids might elect to give it away to others, sell it to other kids, or not participate in trick or treating the next year. Wouldn’t that be better than wasting all that money? After all, candy is not free. Some people elect to buy it to give kids one night of “fun”.  

I see no reason to buy candy that could be tossed out. If I did buy it, it’d be for me. Someone is going to benefit from it. I’m not seeing my money tossed out in the garbage.

Parents Who Buy the Candy Back To Throw Out –

Ah, yes … parents. Sometimes they can be a fun sponge, other times? Your best friend.

I have to hand it to my mom, she was one smart parent for being a first (and only) timer. She did things right the first time.

The one time I remember trick-or-treating … it was when I was about 5/6 (around 1981/1982) and she went with me. We hit up on well-lit houses, only if they seemed “friendly” or we knew them (friends’ houses), and she looked at the choices – no homemade treats ever, only “wrapped known” candy bars only (the “fun size” ones).

When we got back to the house, she inspected the packaging to make sure it was intact and not tampered with and she’d cut it in half, packaging still on it to ensure no razor blades. She smelled it, tasted it, and gave me my “part” after it was deemed “safe”. I got one treat per day – no more. Well, unless my mom wanted more. The thought of throwing that candy out sickened her to no end. If she didn’t want me to have it, she wouldn’t have allowed me to do it.

When I told my mom about a former friend who bought her children’s candy only to throw it away – my mother was repulsed. Though it was the woman’s money and her kids, my mother’s first thought was “you only give them one treat a day, it’s going to sit around. It isn’t their fault you’re looking at it and having cravings yourself”.

That was the actual reason the person bought her kids’ candy (she has two kids). She was tired of looking in the cabinet, seeing it in the bucket, and feeling tempted. She’s a sports/fitness/health type. So, she offered to give the kids money for it so she could throw it away. If the kids didn’t agree – the candy would still have been thrown out and they’d have nothing.

Sorry, but if you’re going to let your kids trick-or-treat, they will get treats. Don’t want the treats? Don’t let them go. Explain it. Have a party instead, extra “video game” or movie time. Pop some natural popcorn, let them choose dinner … but why spend the money on a costume, let them go out, and toss their candy?

So, that is reason #3 I don’t give out candy. I can find other uses for my money. I can buy myself (and my mom) a movie, popcorn, candy, and/or dinner out. After all, we make sure we get full use of our money and/or what we buy with it.

Hating Halloween –

I’m not in this category. I’m just not fond of it. Again, it is the one night of the year I feel like I have to “re-treat” into another part of the house so I don’t have to worry about kids not reading the sign and knocking on the door.

Lights out, sign up, and hidden away. Great way to spend the evening. And, with it falling on a Friday … going to be a long one.

Since 2008, we’ve lived in a two-level town-home – so I can go up to my room (which has a dark curtain for the day sun ), and hide out up there. Thankfully, I have a refrigerator for snacks and drinks. That has helped when I’ve been sick and/or bedridden.

But, there are some that just hate the holiday. I’m not going into it.

Religiously Opposed to Halloween –

This is the newest one I’ve seen this year. Up until this year, I hadn’t even thought of the “religious” side of celebrating the holiday.

While I have my own faith and beliefs, I won’t argue with anyone else’s feelings on this. Obviously, that is what their heart believes, so I let them to it. There is no one perfect faith for all as we all have different emotional and spiritual needs.

But, being called evil, demonic, and “judging” me if I want to decorate with cute (not scary or gory) witches and ghosts – that goes too far in my book. Calling me evil and demonic for “dressing up”? I think that goes too far, just my thought there.

I don’t worship Satan, I don’t promote Satanism, and I don’t perform Satanic rituals. I don’t believe in human or animal sacrifices. End of story!

When I do “dress up”, I prefer to dress up as say … an NCIS agent (I have a t-shirt, hat, and a windbreaker), a police officer, a firefighter, or a medical person (doctor, nurse, EMT, paramedic). How in whoever’s name you believe in, is that evil? How is dressing up (imitating) someone of a good moral character, someone fighting the “good fight” … evil? I just can’t get the thought process behind that.

I’ve dressed up (as close as I can) to a favorite TV show character. Some like to dress up as Abby from NCIS. That’s pretty cool. A forensic scientist? That’s cool.

A princess? As long as she’s a good one. A witch? Hello, Glenda (“Wizard of Oz”)? A cute ghost? A cute frog? A good superhero (Batman, Spiderman, etc)? I don’t see these as evil. I cannot do it.

How about a cute flower, bee, ladybug, princess?

I have done the princess and cute ghost routine. I’ve been a nurse and an NCIS agent. As long as the costume isn’t “scary”, “gory”, “humiliating”, emulating an evil character/criminal, or “degrading” … I say have fun. Really.

Don’t Take Candy From Strangers –

I see the logic here. All year long 364-365 days (one added for leap years), we tell kids “DON’T TAKE CANDY FROM STRANGERS”, yet on Halloween … we promote the notion of going door to door begging “trick-or-treat”.

Okay, I get this one.

Why not gather some neighbors, friends, co-workers, and family for a “trick-or-treat” scavenger hunt/party? Treats could be hidden for the guests’ children with a rule of one treat per location (ie: behind a plant – 5 treats, 5 kids, one for each). They mark them off on a list and first to get them all … wins a prize. After that? Each one gets a different/special treat.

Sounds like fun. If you’re non-religious, you can celebrate the holiday anyway you like. If you are, you can work in a bible lesson.

Why I Wrote This –

I wrote this in hopes that everyone understands … we all have our feelings when it comes to Halloween. The same with Thanksgiving and Christmas. No one way is right though – it is not anyone’s place to judge someone.

I don’t give out candy because it is expensive, there are food allergies, dentists and parents love throwing it away. Why do it? I’ll get it, if I want, for me.

I don’t like being judged or feeling as if I am a terrible or evil person for one night “emulating” a hero or being a fairy or ladybug.

I see it as a fun day to do something that we as kids lose as we grow older – our ability to be free, innocent, dress up, and “pretend” for one night in a crazy, hectic, and scary life.

That can’t be a bad thing … now, about ladybugs … 

[Found this "costume" at http://www.costumecraze.com/ANML340.html]